We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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