i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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