Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
How's work?
Spinning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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