I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm sobbing to NWA
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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