So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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