This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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