on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize