I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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