Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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