The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize