Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize