the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
These tits shall not be calmed
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize