I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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