i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
She announced her abortion via fbk
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize