sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize