Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize