Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize