3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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