I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Randomize