I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
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My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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