You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize