I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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