kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize