I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
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Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
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I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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