So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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