i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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