Already got asked if we're dating
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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