please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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