why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize