I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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