Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.

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  (917): Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool. http://tfl.nu/25pz
  Replies (1) Good night (885) Bad night (396) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex

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  (314): he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex http://tfl.nu/lecw
  Replies (62) Good night (2031) Bad night (13170) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too

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  (614): Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too http://tfl.nu/p8r6
  Replies (24) Good night (587) Bad night (1906) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?

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  (651): how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting? http://tfl.nu/ew93
  Replies (29) Good night (4934) Bad night (840) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.

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  (701): Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this. http://tfl.nu/tncp
  Replies (22) Good night (1607) Bad night (3898) Order T-Shirt
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".

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  (864): We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me". http://tfl.nu/ag7w
  Replies (3) Good night (3254) Bad night (798) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.

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  (239): Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis. http://tfl.nu/6cer
  Replies (23) Good night (1204) Bad night (5264) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.

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  (978): the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase. http://tfl.nu/thr7
  Replies (11) Good night (1019) Bad night (1852) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.

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  (724): I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out. http://tfl.nu/ua1b
  Replies (11) Good night (944) Bad night (1971)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?

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  (870): Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with? http://tfl.nu/z4e7
  Replies (30) Good night (466) Bad night (2291) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.

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  (910): Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad. http://tfl.nu/mvcz
  Replies (4) Good night (392) Bad night (829) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress

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  (202): he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress http://tfl.nu/kmvd
  Replies (6) Good night (1195) Bad night (205) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot

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  (215): I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot http://tfl.nu/otr7
  Replies (3) Good night (647) Bad night (187) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.

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  (616): you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience. http://tfl.nu/y98f
  Replies (1) Good night (687) Bad night (139) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.

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  (813): Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line. http://tfl.nu/x7j1
  Replies (4) Good night (547) Bad night (104) Order T-Shirt

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