Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I think people are normalizing furries
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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