I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
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he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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