Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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