just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize