dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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