I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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