How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
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He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
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I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
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