end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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