i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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