that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
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i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
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Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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