I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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