i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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