I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
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no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
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It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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