The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
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You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
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He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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