Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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