Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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