Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize