i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize