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I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
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